100 Signs You Might Live in the Capitol Region…

Adapted from a few Existing Lists on the Subject, sliced, diced rearranged, and with quite a few additions… I now Present:

100 Signs You Might Live in the Capitol Region:

1. You refer to downtown Albany as “The City”.
2. You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter, construction.
3. You bought a snow blower before a lawn mower.
4. You design your children’s Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
5. You’ve uses your back porch or the trunk of your car as a fridge/deep freeze.
6. You often switch from “heat” to “A/C” in the same day.
7. You use a down comforter in the summer.
8. You drive at 65 MPH through 13 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching.
9. You carry jumper cables in your car and your kids know how to use them.
10. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.
11. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway.
12. You know several people who have hit deer more than once
13. You refer to the interchange of the Thruway and the Northway as “The 24 Tolls”
14. You explain to your friends from out-of-town that nobody actually calls it the Thaddeus Kosiusko Bridge.
15. You’ve never called I-87 anything other than “The Northway”.
16. You know where to find “The Twins”.
17. And you know when there is and isn’t going to be traffic there.
18. It doesn’t bother you that the Northway has no Exit 3.
19. You measure distance in hours.
20. You understand how people can say they live in Clifton Park when their mailing address is Halfmoon.
21. And how people can say they live in Glenville when their mailing address is Scotia.
22. You know enough to avoid any vehicle on the Northway with Canadian plates.
23. There’s a mini-mall every 1/4 mile; if not, you’re in Vermont.
24. You think every place has a Central Avenue and Wolf Road.
25. While driving down Loudonville Road, you know what it means to make a right turn at ‘the dog’.
26. You know Hamilton Hill isn’t a clothing designer.
27. The name Arbor Hill doesn’t bring anything plant-related to mind.
28. It’s SODA dammit! And people who call it POP make you want to slap them.
29. ‘First Night’ isn’t a Sean Connery movie.
30. You aren’t freaked out when you see the GE sign lit up at XMAS.
31. You still sometimes call it the “Knick” instead of the “Pepsi”.
32. The Egg: It isn’t just for breakfast anymore.
33. You can’t give directions to Albany Med to save your life.
34. You know that AirTite Windows ripped Resnicks’s sign down (but later put it back up.)
35. You know who Nina (of Manchester) and her husband are, AND how they sell diamonds for less than 33%.
36. You know who that guy Ken Goewey is. You may even actually know Ken Goewey.
37. Everybody likes Jack Byrne, but Terry Morris is STILL number one.
38. You know what’s at “1960 Central Ave., 3 miles west of Northway exit 2W”.
39. You can answer this question: “What color Orange Ford do you own?”
40. There’s no such thing as waiting for the left turn arrow at an intersection.
41. Milk = Stewart’s, Cookies = Freihofer’s, Bagles = Brueggers. End of story.
42. Hippo’s has it.
43. “Hurt in an auto accident? You know who to call…”
44. You’re either adamantly FOR or Against Guptills. (Personally, I’m Against.)
45. You know at which water park the fun (and that SONG) never stops.
46. And no amount of heated water can make up for that repetitive jingle.
47. So you slide slide slide awaaaaay… to someplace Wild (You Bet!) instead.
48. You’ve spent the equivalent of the GDP of Nicaragua trying to win a stuffed animal at the Great Escape.
49. Which, by the way, you preferred before it was a 6 Flags Park.
50. You thought Hoffman’s Playland was the the BEST amusement park as a child.
51. You’ve looked for adventure, at Catskill Game Farm (Adventure is in our Nature!)
52. Your career ambition is to work for the State.
53. You, or someone in your Family, works at KAPL.
54. Grandma’s Pies weren’t made by your momma’s momma.
55. With even the slightest threat of snow, you know that Ichabod Crane school is closed.
56. And no matter how much snow there is, Shen isn’t.
57. You know there’s nothing International about our airport.
58. You know how to say AND spell ‘Schenectady’ and ‘Rensselaer’.
59. You can correctly pronounce the words Kosciuszko, Cohoes, Coeymans, Watervliet and Kayaderosseras.
60. You know not to drink the water at the Washington County Fair. (And Why.)
61. Live at 5 is dead by 6.
62. You work at Price Chopper, but you shop at Hannaford.
63. You remember when Hannaford was still Shop ‘n’ Save.
64. There’s a Hannaford Truck in your 4th of July Parade.
65. “Vacation” means going to Lake George (or Rochester) for the weekend.
66. You know what and where Nipper is.
67. You remember when Crossgates was only half as big as it is now.
68. You’ve given up looking for a bookstore in it.
69. You know what a Karner Blue is.
70. And what a pine barren is and where you can find one.
71. You’ve ever rooted for the River Rats.
72. You grew up on Channels 6, 10, and 13.
73. The word “dredge” immediately conjures up thoughts of GE.
74. You expect Canadian coins in your change now and then.
75. You never expect them to pass the budget on time.
76. Double parked cars are no more than a minor annoyance.
77. You know the 3 closest Stewart’s shops to your house.
78. In fact, you can give directions to almost anywhere entirely in terms of Stewart’s Shops. (Ok, at the first Stuarts you come to, take a left…)
79. You know that there are two different Route 7s off the Northway. Bonus if you know there used to only be one.
80. You know what SPAC stands for.
81. In fact, you Graduated there.
82. You go to or know someone who goes to UAlbany.
83. You know what SUNY means.
84. You’ve ever gone up in the Corning Tower.
85. You know where Buildings 1, 2, 3, and 4 are.
86. You know which city is the Collar City and which is the Electric City.
87. You think Saratoga is classy.
88. You or someone you know has grandparents in Amsterdam.
89. It also doesn’t bother you that Central Ave. is State Street at the other end.
90. January Regents Week holds a special place in your heart.
91. You know the school colors of every school in your division.
92. If there’s a chance of a snow day then every radio in your house is tuned to WGY, or B95.5.
93. You’ve argued with your parents to take the car out in the middle of a blizzard.
94. You remember Ranger Danger. (Ayauh!)
95. You can name 5 schools in the Suburban Council. (Go Shen!)
96. You have an ingrained taste for concrete architecture.
97. You know “The Track” is The August Place To Be.
98. You can think of at least 4 different ways to get to Stuyvesant Plaza from the same starting point.
99. You know that you do nothing but eat and drink at the Albany Pump Station.
100. People ask you where you live, and you tell them your Exit on the Northway.


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3 Responses to 100 Signs You Might Live in the Capitol Region…

  1. mattimusrex says:

    I live in a different capitol, and our capitol building is shaped like a penis. Seriously. I’ll show you a picture sometime. 🙂

  2. Haha, gotta love obscurely shaped buildings and public monuments. Speaking of penis shaped things, there’s this rock that is one.

    BTW Marisa, adding you to my EllJay friends list.

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